2 ways to cope with the statement, “just get over it,” when you are experiencing depression during Covid-19.
Ever since my first episode, April has been a hard month for me. Depression seems to sweep me to my knees. Sometimes it hits for only 24 hours and sometimes for 2 weeks. I feel depression, not only in an emotional way, but physically as well. My eye lids get heavy in the sunlight and I feel as if I cannot rise from my bed as the weight of a human body seems to hang from my shoulders. When the sun starts to set, I wake up and seem to have endless energy into the night, which only perpetuates the darkness the following day. Currently, I am stable on my medication. I have been for 12 years. I have my levels checked regularly. I am in constant contact with both my psychologist and my psychiatrist, and I have a host of friends that check in on me to keep me going. I am very fortunate for this and I am very grateful. But the phrase, “just get over it,” is not far from my psyche.
When April 2020 came, I thought I had made it through with only a 24 hour spell. Unfortunately, and unusually it came again for another few days. As I lay in bed, unable to open my eyes to the light of the sun I have so missed, I heard that phrase in my head and thought, “how do I get this thought to move on?” Here are two ways, I coped with the phrase, “just get over it,” this year. I hope they will help you in your mental heath journey.
1. Show yourself Mercy and Compassion
This year, I decided to show myself some mercy and compassion. Most years, when the depression comes, I force myself to go for a walk, or play guitar. This year I decided I was not going to force myself to do anything. I let myself sit and watch movies when my eyes were able to open fully. I let myself take naps, when I normally force myself to stay awake. I gave myself permission to cry and feel anything I wanted to feel and at first it felt wrong. My body soon felt safe, and was able to move through the depression as it needed.
2. Thought stop and do not beat yourself up
If you find your inner critic yelling “just get over it,” ask yourself, HOW? None of us have been through this before. You are having to learn new skills as each day comes, as each news report tells us more sad and unnerving news. Please, “thought stop,” and don’t beat yourself up. As hard as that may be right now, I know it is possible. What I do is start looking around the room saying to color of each item I see or I close my eyes and mentally go to the ocean. I feel the sand in my toes, I watch the waves crash on the shore. When your thoughts move back to harsh self criticism, you have not failed. Bring your mind back to what you know is true. This too shall pass and you are not alone.
Most of us were not alive for the 1918 flu and have never personally experienced a pandemic. All of my friends and family with a depression are struggling just like me right now. But so are the people who do not have any mental health diagnosis. We are all feeling the fear, worry and stress that comes with change. We are all grieving in some form and many that have never known what depression feels like are now experiencing that very emotion. You may be depressed and grieving not being able to see a family member graduate from college. You may be depressed for not being able to hold your new god-son or from missing a child hitting a mile stone. All normalcy has been thrown out the window. No matter what you have done to keep a schedule or maintain your diet, you must remember we have never done this before, so how can we know how to do this now? How can it be possible to know how to, “just get over it.”
With Love and Light,
Melissa
