Wife. Wonderful instigator of fury and electricity.
I have always wanted to be a wife. When I was little I played with my neighbors granddaughter and we would make up our boyfriends and go on pretend dates with them and then meet at the play ground to tell each other how amazing our boyfriends were. Ha. My boyfriend was named Mike. A very Ken and Barbie kind of name. But the powers of the women’s movement years before my birth sent waves through my friends and everyone was driven for Ivy league schools and professions that would lead them to settle down in their 30s and then think about kids. This was the way of the Westchester County kid. We fast forward to me at 24, on my birthday sobbing my eyes out because I was not getting married in the same time line as not only my friends but my Mother, who I adored and looked up to with everything in my being. At the time I was working 4 jobs in my first year out of my liberal arts college (that taught me to write essays on black theology and social justice but didn’t prepare me for how do you say it…real life, job interviews, the truth about how our society works.) I struggled to pay rent, to buy groceries and could not go out to the movies or really date. Flash forward to age 33. I had Aced my way through a science degree, I was an occupational therapy assistant but still dreamed of meeting Mr. Right and much to my friends dismay, staying home with the kids. I worked and Met my now husband and after 4.7 years of marriage, the joy I have getting dinner on the table at 6 when he gets home is overwhelmingly wonderful. I am a 50s wife in a working women, me too, era.
I love my husband. I love him so much that it overwhelms me so much. I can’t get enough of him and honestly can’t keep my hands off him. He is an introvert raised with no touch and I am an extrovert raised with hugs and kisses from all family members. So it has been a culture shock being married for both of us. I would say boundaries and constant communication is a must to the survival of our marriage and honestly the honeymoon period is far from over.